As an artist, I’m sensitive to pluralism – or at least the duality of many things.  This year has sped by and yet is far from over;  We are a society that maintains a certain conservatism and yet is also very expressive;  There is seldom a question about what we as individuals love and yet it is not always made obvious.

From just these 3 examples, I apply an awareness of the season as it approaches.  It is such a beautiful time of year and one that elicits powerful emotions and passionate beliefs.  Unfortunately, it can also be quickly corrupted by commercialism, ignorance, and ego.

Regardless of your convictions, wouldn’t it be wonderful if we acted deliberately, reflectively, and respectfully as we savored the holidays?  I witness many who celebrate a tradition of setting aside petty differences, show a little more courtesy, and spread good will.  How powerful if that tradition extended beyond a 2 month period!

While I’m sure I’m not the first to extol this perspective, I can hope that my voice will be added to the collective, and have a ripple effect. 

You too can be a part of such a movement, and I hope that this holiday season brings you and yours peace and joy.

Creatives often fail to succeed.  It can be a result of poor endurance, lack of tenacity, terrible business savvy, a fear of failure or even a fear of success.  But there is an ironic fault as well that I don’t think many consider – especially while enjoying a measure of it, even on their terms.

Self-esteem and the complaint.

While it is similar to the fear of failure being realized, it can actually be the creative being their own worst enemy.  It is the perfectionist nature conflicting with, magnifying, and never healing from a criticism.

I don’t know a quality artist who doesn’t continue to worry – even obsess – about their craft.  It is said that once you stop worrying, you’re no longer good.  However thick-skinned a person must be to courageously express their form to a judgemental public, a creative must still maintain a sensitivity to produce good art.  Otherwise, their heart also becomes hardened and then inspiration dies.

But in the business of creating, what do you do when you strive to do your best, even achieve an unsurpassed level of quality, and still have an issue to address?

Whether it’s a percentage of your audience or just one person, a complaint can be crippling.  Still, there are several things to keep in mind to achieve a clear conscience and a renewed spirit. 

1) Mean people exist.  They may be having a bad day, bad year, bad life and you’re just in the wrong place at the wrong time.  An issue probably doesn’t exist at all.  Also, this is a category where someone always has it worse than you.  If you doubt that adage, ask anyone in in customer service, retail or restaurants. 

2) Buyer’s remorse.  If you offer a premium service and a premium price is ascribed, be prepared for someone to find fault with it.   They’ll have standards established in their mind that no one can meet.  This can also hold true for discounted services.  While “you get what you pay for”, you often encounter “you get what you sell for” – lower price can meet lower class.

3) The green-eyed monster.   Sometimes, the fault-finding is out of sheer jealousy for their own failed attempts at your career path.  Their issues are not your issues.  Mentally deflect that energy.

4) Confusion.  Perhaps you were mis-represented to them.  It may be that a misunderstanding exists or just a semantic barrier.  I’ve yet to over-clarify or over-confirm details on any event.   Most often, clear & concise communication brings other opportunities to the table.

Above all, recognize that what makes you a great artist also makes you vulnerable.  Manage a balance between talent and your nature and you’ll persevere.

And on the odd chance that you have made a mistake, make amends quickly.  Don’t shy away from addressing complaints, thoroughly and seeking satisfaction.  That’s a sign of integrity and regardless of service, is respectable.  You may also learn something about the way you’re perceived and how you do business.  You can’t improve if you don’t know what you need improvement in!

Now forgive yourself and move on.  You can’t walk on water anyway, can you?

The joy of discovery.  When was the last time you experienced it?

I’m not talking about learning something new – as many goals entail and fall short with your lack of endurance (did you really pick up a new language or become a virtuoso?)

I’m talking about trying those “sounds like fun” activities.  The ones that really aren’t that time consuming and would make for a good occupation for a Sunday afternoon or date night.

Expert status is not a goal.  You don’t even have to be good at it.  For example I find beach volleyball and shooting pool to be fun – and I’m terrible (but it’s fun to put on a game face so that accounts for something.)

And there are a lot of free programs out there so money really isn’t an issue for trying something new.

So what’s stopping you? 

One adversity is habit.  Forming or breaking a habit requires 7 consecutive events.  If you want to try something, it could be your habit for procrastination or talking yourself out of it is getting in the way.

Another strong adversity is age.  As we age, we naturally tend to slow down as life seems to speed up.  We also tend to reject change and new technology.  It’s not really a choice, just a trait of the aging process. 

Both of these can be acknowledged and rejected.  If you somehow make time for eating, sleeping and using the facilities, you know you can set aside a few minutes to learn Chinese Checkers – and play with your kids at the same time!

If you’re a parent, you may be allowing or disallowing your child to follow the same path.  Don’t forget the little ones and how their lives may be enriched by a random experience.

Wouldn’t it be great if your high school guidance counselor got a re-evaluation of your life and identified new potential (if they were any good in the first place, that is.)  You can be that for yourself and your children.

Throw a canvas and some paint at them and see what happens.

Drop a tub of blocks in the middle of them and see what happens.

Give them a blob of clay and see what happens.

In short, even if you’re an old fuddy-duddy, you can still have conduct your own field experiments a la Discovery Channel special.  “Kids in the wild!  These children have been placed in the middle of a field with an assortment of plastic toys and balls.  Let’s see what they come up with!” 

It promotes creativity and you can incorporate a whole set of values if “rules” become a part of the experience (”What happens if the rubber chicken lands on the red square?”)

A little thing can make a big impact in your life or the life of your child.  And you may change the world because you were important in that life.  While life keeps changing around you, don’t discount your on-going responsibility to change the world in your own way.