I’m living the dream.

I may not be living your dream, or even your idea of what my dream should be, but I am enjoying success.

It’s an eerie feeling in a way - almost as if this is the end of it all, I should be awarded a medal or somehow credits should be scrolling in front of my face. 

On the other hand, not a lot of people ever get to this point.  It’s worth savoring for a while.  And the fact that I’ve achieved it at so young an age, (again a relative point) is even more exciting and disconcerting at the same time.

The dichotomy is a bi-product of a clear focus I’ve had since I was in 2nd grade.  I’ve always known that I wanted to be a professional artist.  I still remember the internal dialogue and had it all figured out by lunch time.

Yes.  very rare.  Freakish even, no?

Of course I’ve run into nay-sayers, negativity, backlash - all the things that can either galvanize your resolve or derail you completely.  I don’t know anyone I could define as “great” in any category of life who hasn’t had such adversity.

So, at the continued risk of sounding cocky, what do I do now?

I spend a lot of time reflecting on the choices, decisions, paths I’ve taken, and the directions I’ve influenced or led others to take.  The conclusion I’ve come to is that it’s important to keep raising your own bar.

I don’t know anyone who will continually challenge or expect more of me.  I’ve got to be ready to shoot for the next step.  Even if I’m living the dream, maybe it’s time for a new one.

People I find interesting are always doing this.  It’s not the same as job-jumping or being one of those annoying free-spirited people with no responsibilities or (even worse) someone who never has to worry about money.  It’s a paradox of satisfaction and hunger.

So it may take a change in attitude, outlook, location or even circle of friends, but what do you expect?  And even more important, what happens WHEN you achieve it?

I find myself discussing the nature of the professional with many clients.  It can be an intriguing conversation.  While I’m under no illusions that many people in the world can do what I do, few can do it well.  Even fewer can offer the service as a professional.

But why and what does that mean?

It seems every category of business has it’s definition - from simply being paid for the work to a library of handbooks and corporate dogma.

In our world, it’s an elusive topic because the stereotypical artist is alive and well.  Creativity outweighs a lot of conservative traits.  In fact, we almost WANT our artists to be weird to be qualified, don’t we?

The downside is that it also makes art and its creators dismissible.  The devaluation of talent is world-wide.  When it comes to business matters such as negotiating a contract, ascribing philosophy to a project, or just having the verbal skills to discuss something outside of one’s profession, too many artists fall short.

Ironically, the reverse seems to be true also.  With the right marketing, a talentless hack can make a fortune (”It’s good art because it’s expensive”)

And I’ve yet to find an art program in continuing education that prepares students for marketing themselves and their services.  So it seems the trend continues.

But in light of this, here are a few universal truths (as I find them) that separate an artist from a professional artist:

1) The professional communicates thoroughly and seeks to understand the need of the client - not promote their own agenda.  This means being sensitive to the client’s availability to discuss things - and being patient with them if necessary.

2) The professional confirms all details and doesn’t leave anything to assumption.

3) The professional shows up early - with enough time to prepare for a successful event

4) The professional does their best work - always!

5) The professional doesn’t disparage, cater to drama, subscribe to gossip, and always speaks well of others (especially in public - someone always sees or hears everything!)

6) The professional delivers what was promised

7) The professional does a thorough and complete job and doesn’t cut corners (on time, materials or quality)

The professional checks for satisfaction and addresses any concerns to the best of their ability

9) The professional says thank you!

10) The professional follows up for the next event!

You’ll notice that the type of service and the price are not points of professionalism.  Intangible things matter most. 

How do you compare?

I don’t know of a company or corporation that doesn’t have a dress code.  In fact, some positions are known by their dress code or uniform.  It’s part of the branding process.  It isn’t even a business perspective - have you ever seen a man dressed all in black with a white collar and NOT known what he was? (for the atheists, the answer would be “a priest”)

Another advantage of uniforms are that they hold the mystique to others as well as certain behavioral parameters.  Police officers come to mind - there are strict codes for what actions and behaviors are allowed, tolerated or even encouraged depending on whether or not the officer is “on duty”

But there is another side to being in uniform.  And my message today really only applies to those who are true “company” - they may or may not own the business, but they’ve bought into it - all the way. 

And I’m not really addressing workaholics here (besides, that’s a pretty silly term anyway - is there even such a thing as “workahol”?  I think Webster’s needs to get involved with that one.)  What I am talking about are those people who have strong work ethics and morals.  They have a sense of balance and they aren’t afraid to put full value forth to benefit their employer.

Have you ever found it difficult to relax after work?  Do you find yourself gravitating towards business-related tasks as a bad habit of sorts - or as if you’re running on automatic pilot?  Did you notice that you haven’t changed your clothes yet?

This is a psychological condition that affects many who have established a certain momentum in their schedule.  The uniform, the brand, the persona, etc. is also a state of mind that becomes you.  At the risk of being corny, your “work mode” is in many ways a different person altogether.

The solution is to change your clothes - in fact, have certain garb options that fit ONLY into “relaxing clothes”  This habit holds true at the beginning of your day.  If you’re not ready to start work, don’t start dressing the part too soon.  The switch comes on once that last lace or button is done.

The necktie in particular has often been called the “corporate noose” (ever notice the similarities?)  Sometimes that is all it takes to restrict the blood flow and turn off any relaxing thoughts you may ever have for the rest of your shift.

So take a moment to reflect upon your state of mind, your environment, and make the mental note to arrest your unconscious habits.  Once you’ve made the change (literally) you’ll find that you truly have “clocked out for the day.”

I love Halloween!  As an artist, I find it inspiring.  My mind fills with ideas for décor, atmosphere, and the ever-exciting “what will I be this year?”

Of course I’m allowed to enjoy it as an adult – it makes for great role modeling for my children.  They too become infected with my zest for the holiday and all the imagination-building fun. 

So in the spirit of creativity, I have the following design-on-a-dime costume ideas for kids-of-all-ages:

1)      Skip the mask:  Masks are fun but can also be expensive, hot and hazardous.  Anyone who remembers the plastic “blinders” with the single rubber band will agree.  If you couldn’t see or breathe very well, at least you could look forward to the rubber band breaking and snapping you in the eye.  Parents, try makeup instead.  A little rouge and you have instant clown.  Some well placed mascara and voila – instant diva (or princess) (Tip: Avoid grease paint unless you like scrubbing tired cranky dirty children for hours.)

2)      Oh the many joys of garbage bags:  plastic is a great insulator and trash bags come in more than one color.  They can also fit over just about any layered undercoating.  Uses:  Togas, robes, even capes if trimmed carefully.

3)      Go cerebral:  A good costume isn’t always obvious.  Sometimes it’s more fun to have a conversation piece.  Ask the kids to make up an obscure super-hero like Captain Happy – dress them all in yellow and let them canvas the neighborhood laughing.  Or put a small chair on their head and go as “gum” (get it?)

4)      Size can be everything:  Fit more than 1 kid in an oversized sweatsuit and you’ve got 2-headed monster!  Dad’s clothes and a little extra stuffing and you have “mini-me” or your home-made “Hulk.” Try the opposite effect with undersized clothing and be “The Incredible-growing-child” (a little faux 5 o’clock shadow will enhance the effect.)

5)      Wrap n’ roll:  T.p. your child and instant-mummify.  Some well-adhered holiday paper and you have “The Walking Gift.”  Save the empty rolls for horns, fake noses, spikes, anything you can imagine.

When it’s all over, you’ve spent some quality bonding time in the pursuit of free sugar.  You could even say you’re making a political statement (“old-fashioned”, “timeless”, “economical”, “just like I wore when I was his/her age”) You may even be surprised by some of the ideas your child can come up with. 

Enjoy it while you take your inspector’s cut of the candy.

The price-gougers, the cost-cutters, the bargain-basement operators.  Sounds pretty good to the average shopper doesn’t it?

But have you ever purchased something that didn’t live up to the bargain?  That cheap pair of shoes that you had to replace 3 more times in a year, the bulk jar of ketchup that you used just as fast as the regular size, the generic brand electronic device that (”oh by the way”) doesn’t have all the features as the real deal.

The same holds true with services.  Of course everyone has budgets and as service providers we want to be sensitive to those budgets.  Unlike Congress, when there’s no money for something - there really ISN’T a way to pay for it.  And when you’re hanging out your shingle, you don’t want to out-price everyone.  The market can only bear so much.

But the other side of the coin is some things just cost what they cost.  I’ve never known the price of gold to be up for a haggle.  It may rise or fall, but does that have to do with one person’s decision (conspiracy theorists need not comment here!)

So when you’ve achieved the highest degree, the most experience and can do things the best, you’re worth your investment.  Are you a ”Nike” or a “K Swiss”?  Are you a “Coke” or a “Faygo”?  Are you a “Rolls Royce” or a “Chevy”?  All are good brands and I’d take any of them if they were offered.  They simply cost what they cost. 

The hardest thing you may ever have to do is take pride in your skills and abilities and even tell a potential (or current) client “I don’t need your business” - or even fire them! 

If you’re doing your best and “you’re worth what you’re worth”, you’re dealing with business that will never respect you anyway and (even if they go with a cheap competitor) it reflects on their ethics - they’ll get what they pay for:  Low quality, suspicious business practices (maybe even illegal) and ultimately you dont’ want to be associated with any of that!  Trust me, they’ll be replaced with the kind of clients you want (and most likely will not only be able to afford you, but never think twice about doing it right.)

Ultimately, the things that shouldn’t be open for negotiation are your character and integrity.

I’m writing this one from a creative’s perspective, but it could apply to anyone who works hard and believes in the work that they do.

When you’re “living the dream”, whatever that dream may be, it’s very easy to trade off the important things in your life (health, personal growth, fitness, loved ones, etc.) as a price.  The saddest part is that you don’t have to.  It’s all about balance and maintaining a sense of mortality.

When we’re young, we’re unconscious. We’re limited only by our imagination.  Reckless abandon and an invulnerable sense blind us to the big picture.  It’s why we equate age with wisdom.  Slowing down causes us to reflect more (have you ever seen a memoir by a 20-year old?)

The trouble is that the momentum of youth can often carry over into the rest of our life - and along with it high blood pressure, anxiety, heart disease, and all other sorts of nasty.

Ironically, the good habits and achieving balance also follow the same advice and direction of an efficiency expert.  If you work hard but also play hard (or rest hard) then you’re going to be sharper, stronger, healthier, more productive AND have all the other priorities in your life maintained (loved ones, your faith, smelling the roses, etc.)

In the grand scheme of things, you’re just a blip on the timeline.  Recognize that life was here before you and will carry on (”some how”) without you.  Savor your time and make it last because you’ll be judged by how you lived (and eternity is a loooooong time)

It’s an ironic and saddening human characteristic that many creatives face - Backlash.

You receive a lot of support and encouragement to develop, achieve, succeed and then face (sometimes) the same people and their green-eyed monster.

To put this into further context, while the backlash can come from anywhere it’s unlikely to come from anyone who truly cares about you.  That being stated, you also must realize how very special you and your abilities are (while staying humble, of course!)

It’s truly rare, given the grand scheme of things, to find someone who a) Knows what they want to do with their life; b) Actually sets out to achieve it and; c) Achieves it!  To meet someone who’s “living the dream” can sit uneasy with many who haven’t discerned the above.

The backlashers probably won’t actively undermine your career like some arch-enemy in a comic book, but they won’t necessarily sing your praises either.  If they were once your biggest fan, they may start to realize that they’ve been living vicariously through you and that they haven’t amounted to a hill of beans.  Such an epiphany is shocking.

The backlash could come from your competition as well - this speaks to business ethics which, sadly, not enough people or corporations follow.

So how to deal? 

1) Stay the course:  Obviously your clients like you and what you represent.  Don’t fix it if it ain’t broke. 

2) Educate your clients on your abilities, any new developments or products.  They may be looking for “something different” and just not know you do that too.

3) Treat every good client like you would your own family.  Develop loyalty and compassion.  When you’re able to forge even a quasi-personal relationship, clients will be less likely to want to change.

4) Be sensitive to budgets when necessary.  Sometimes the decision is out of the hands of your relationship - even long-standing.  Sometimes contacts change.  Turnover is inevitable.  If they’re all about “who can do it the cheapest” though, they’ll always look for a way to low-ball you - you don’t need clients like that.  Some day they’ll learn you always get what you pay for.

5) Keep walking the high path:  Always say the nicest (honest) thing you can about anyone you may be associated with.  You never know who-knows-who and how they may be judging your character.  If your reputation is strong, anyone who tries to tarnish you will only do themselves the dirt.

I like to be ideal and dismiss the notion that anyone would fail to see the big picture - there’s plenty for everyone (especially in our society) and there’s room for all sorts of styles, talents, abilities, and skills.  However this is sadly not the case.  Lean on your support network, keep your focus strong and your conscience clear. 

Against backlashers, success is the best revenge anyway.

To be an artist means that you’ve probably received one of the following:

1) A galvanization of adversity and are too stubborn to quit (like many many many success stories, by the way) 

2) A strong network of friends and family who have always said “you can do it!” and helped you believe just that.

3) A combination of both (like yours truly)

I wish to speak to “#2″ because it is perhaps the most powerful and yet the most fragile.

Whether it is a multitude of loving supporters or just a precious few - even 1 - It’s important to remember that their support is unsolicited, inspired and honest.  It takes a lot of energy to be positive and even more to share those feelings with others.  If it’s not reciprocated, one gets tired and eventually unlikely to continue acting as such.

So the message?  Say “thank you!”  Tell them you appreciate their support.  Stay humble.  They’re most likely the foundation that helped you achieve greatness in the first place.  Without them, it’s equally likely you’ll crumble.

Like many artists, I’m very sensitive to my environment.  Who I interact with, how the weather is, what’s playing on the radio and so on, are things that affect many of us creatives and non.  To recognize these influences and make a mental choice about how to deal with them helps keep focus, channel inspiration, and even turn a frown upside down.

But then there are rainy days, maybe even flooding your basement, compiled with a car overheating, coupled with a fight with the Mrs., exacerbated by the devaluing of society, adding insult to injury by the dismissive nature of non-creatives (or whatever combination piles up on you sometimes) and you’ll think “THAT’S IT!”

“What’s the point?  I’m taking my ball and bat and going home!  I give up, I’m going to find a mindless job, and work until I die!”

It’s easy to lose perspective.  It’s important to stop and count your blessings.  For example, the poorest person in America is still richer than most of the rest of the world. 

But success is a relative concept, isn’t it?  With a progressive society, comes progressively “raising the bar” - whether it’s done for us or we even do it for ourselves.

So what to do when you’re “full?” You “don’t want to play anymore?”

Hope and faith are a big key to overcoming adversity.  Our character is shown by how we handle pressure.  Leaders panic, but don’t necessarily show it.  Victors still fear, but know that success is worth the struggle.

And it’s important to have a good support network around you - Mom, friends, spouse, kids, whomever you can rely on to say “everything’s going to be all right.  Here, have some chocolate!”

But is that enough?  How do you truly overcome - spirit, mind, body, all of it?

Like our adversities which seem to pile up when we’re at our weakest, so too must our fight encompass all the areas under attack.

So, develop an “adversity emergency” kit and keep it handy.  Here’s one formula:

A c.d. with your favorite song to play on repeat

A big bar of chocolate

Your favorite scene from your favorite comedy movie on a DVD for instant playability

All the lights are on in the room you’re in

You have your best friend/mom/grandpa/etc. on speed dial

A bubble blowing kit

A collection of those squishy stress ball things.

Make sure you’re wearing comfortable clothes

Ignore or shut off e-mail/business phone/anything distracting

And do the above in any order OR all at once!  Granted, it may confuse the heck out of whomever is on the other line of your cell phone, but DO IT.

When depression attacks, fight back.  Recognize your limitations and “break the glass”

And your formula may be entirely different from above, but always have a good one - not one you’ve tired of.  Keep it original because your challenges are going to be coming from all forms and areas, I guarantee it!

GO ROCKY!!

I come from a very supportive family.  I don’t remember a time when I didn’t feel encouraged.  I never had a conversation with my parents where they tried to convince me to do something “just to pay the bills.”  If anything, my upbringing was of the “American Dream” mentality - “GO! DO IT!  WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?  MAKE IT HAPPEN!”

And there are a lot of success stories who didn’t have such a strong support network and still turn out just fine.

However, there is something remarkable about the transition from childhood to adulthood - particularly just after graduation from college (which I recommend, by the way - in our time, a bachelor’s degree is the equivalent of a high school diploma - pretty soon you’ll need a doctorate to work at McDonald’s!  “You want fries with that?  How about my dissertation?”)

But I digress. 

You’ve graduated.  You’re firmly an adult and ready to tackle the great, big world.  It’s exciting, it’s filled with limitless potential.  You’re ready to relate to everyone on an adult level.  Everything has changed.

For an artist - or any creative person, for that matter - the down side is that everything has changed in the way the rest of society relates to you.  Your family is still there, supporting, loving, cheering for you, but everyone else wants you to constantly “prove yourself”

You need experience to get the good job - isn’t that what college was for?  To learn how to do the job?

You need references to be considered trustworthy - but family doesn’t count.  Aren’t they the ones who know you best?

You have a “probation period” before certain security/benefits/status takes effect - what is this, “buyer’s remorse?” 

You actually have encounters with people trying to tear you down - judging you, hoping you’ll fail.  And they may not be the kind Mom always said “were just jealous”

And when you return to the source of your training/preparation/guidance in college you find that while they were willing to help you get into debt, they aren’t very good at training/preparing/guiding you back out of it.

I’ve never heard of a business artist program in college.

I’ve never encountered a support network for creatives.

I’ve never seen/heard/received career guidance from an art professor (to anyone - not just me) that lead to a legitimate, sustainable opportunity for employment.

It’s a drop-off you didn’t know was there.  Scary!

Your family still loves/believes/encourages you, but if they aren’t creatives, that’s about all they can do.  The rest of the world is firmly set against your failure.

And this is a depressing reality.  Even other artists from supportive backgrounds will undermine your abilities.  Jealousy, contempt, ego, many base emotions abound - as if there were no potential for any success - as if there’s only a very small piece of the pie left and everything else is saturated. 

From what I’ve seen, there’s a lot of room for a lot of talent in this world.

So what is a creative to do?

The first step is to recognize this transition before you’ve emerged from the cocoon - years before.  Prepare yourself for it mentally, spiritually and physically.  Believe in the power and beauty of your abilities.

The second step is to begin networking NOW.  Don’t be afraid to collect reference letters in grade school if you have to.  Long-standing relationships speak volumes.

Next, grill your professors about everything you want to learn.  If they can’t teach you and you can transfer out to another school that will, DO IT.  Many creatives “can’t but teach” - I’ve run into a LOT of art teachers who can’t even draw!

And while you’re in school, LEARN BUSINESS!  The ability to relate to the non-creatives (who usually have the money, by the way) on their level will generate opportunities galore for you.  You’ll be educating them and making them re-define their terms and stereotypes. 

It’s never to late to start these processes.  Do not accept your current station and think of yourself as “too old” OR “too young” to do anything.  You’ll continue to learn until you die.  Don’t “get busy dying!”

When you’re the exception to the rule “about artists”, then you’ll gain trust, loyalty, employ-ability, and success.

Just like Mom and Dad always thought you would.